老希尔德布朗

老希尔德布朗

    Old Hildebrand
    Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm
    Once upon a time there was a peasant whose wife appealed to the village priest. The priest wanted ever so much to spend an entire day alone with her, and the peasant's wife was quite willing.
    One day he said to her, "Listen, dear woman, I've thought it through, and I know how the two of us can spend an entire day together. On Wednesday tell your husband that you are sick and lie down in bed moaning and groaning. Carry on like that until Sunday, when in my sermon I will preach that if anyone has a sick child at home, a sick husband, a sick wife, a sick father, a sick mother, a sick sister, brother, or anyone else, then that person should make a pilgrimage to Mount Cuckoo in Italy. There, for a kreuzer, one can get a peck of laurel leaves, and this person's sick child, sick husband, sick wife, sick father, sick mother, sick sister, brother, or anyone else, will be healed on the spot."
    "I'll do it," said the peasant's wife. So on Wednesday she went to bed, moaning and groaning. Her husband did everything for her that he could think of, but nothing helped. Sunday arrived, and the peasant's wife said, "I'm so miserable that I must be near death, but before I die, I would like to hear the sermon that the priest is going to give today."
    The peasant answered, "Oh, my child, you can't go out. If you get up it might make you worse. Look, I'll go to church and pay close attention and tell you everything that the priest says."
    "Good," said the peasant's wife. "Go and pay close attention, and then tell me everything that you have heard."
    So the peasant went to church, and the priest began to preach, saying that if anyone had a sick child at home, a sick husband, a sick wife, a sick father, a sick mother, a sick sister, brother, or anyone else, then that person should make a pilgrimage to Mount Cuckoo in Italy, where a peck of laurel leaves costs one kreuzer, and this person's sick child, sick husband, sick wife, sick father, sick mother, sick sister, brother, or anyone else, will be healed on the spot, and that anyone who might want to undertake this trip should come to him after the mass, and he would give him a sack for the laurel leaves and a kreuzer.
    No one was happier than the peasant, and immediately following the mass he went to the priest and asked for the laurel sack and the kreuzer. Then he went home, and even before going inside called out, "Hurrah! My dear wife, you are just as good as cured. The priest preached today that whoever has a sick child at home, a sick husband, a sick wife, a sick father, a sick mother, a sick sister, brother, or anyone else, then that person should make a pilgrimage to Mount Cuckoo in Italy, where a peck of laurel leaves costs one kreuzer, and this person's sick child, sick husband, sick wife, sick father, sick mother, sick sister, brother, or anyone else, will be healed on the spot, and I got the laurel sack and the kreuzer from the priest, and am going to take off immediately, so you can get better as soon as possible." And with that he set forth.
    He had scarcely left before his wife got out of bed, and the priest arrived. But let's leave them for awhile and see what happened to the peasant. He was hurrying along in order to arrive at Mount Cuckoo as soon as possible, when he met a kinsman. Now this kinsman was an egg man, who was just returning from market, where he had sold his eggs.
    "Bless you!" said the kinsman. "Where are you off to in such a hurry?"
    "In all eternity!" said the peasant. "My wife has become sick, and today in the priest's sermon I heard that if anyone has a sick child at home, a sick husband, a sick wife, a sick father, a sick mother, a sick sister, brother, or anyone else, then that person should make a pilgrimage to Mount Cuckoo in Italy, where a peck of laurel leaves costs one kreuzer, and this person's sick child, sick husband, sick wife, sick father, sick mother, sick sister, brother, or anyone else, will be healed on the spot, and I got the laurel sack and the kreuzer from the priest, and now I am on my way."
    "Listen, kinsman," said the peasant's kinsman. "Don't be so simple as to believe that. Do you know what? The priest wants to spend an entire day alone with your wife. He has given you this task just to get you out from under his feet."
    "My!" the peasant said. "How I would like to know if that is true!"
    "Do you know what?" said his kinsman, "Just climb into my egg basket, and I will carry you home, and you can see for yourself."
    And that is just what happened. The peasant got into the egg basket, and his kinsman carried him home. When they arrived there, the good

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